had these sent by email, thought they were funny, ready for inclusion in the collins 2005 dictionary !
TESTICULATING: Waving your arms around and talking Bollocks.
BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, cr@ps on everything, and then leaves.
ASSMOSIS: The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.
SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.
CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.
PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see that's going on. (This also applies to applause from a promotion because there may be cake.)
MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
SITCOM: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a "home business".
STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being
stressed out and whiny.
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the cr@p out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located.
OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you've just made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all')
AEROPLANE BLONDE: One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.
AUSSIE KISS: Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.
BEER COAT: The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3am in the morning.
BEER COMPASS: The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you've come from.
BOBFOC: Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch.
BREAKING THE SEAL: Your first pee in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.
GREYHOUND: A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.
JOHNNY-NO-STARS: A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training.
MILLENNIUM DOMES: The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually nought in there worth seeing.
MONKEY BATH: A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo! Oo! Oo! Aa!Aa!Aa!".
MYSTERY BUS: The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.
MYSTERY TAXI: The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your bed instead.
PICASSO BUM: A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got four buttocks.
SALAD DODGER: An excellent phrase for an overweight person.
SWAMP-DONKEY: A deeply unattractive woman.
TART FUEL: Bottled Alcopops, e.g. Hooch, regularly consumed by young women.
new phrases and words for the 2005 dictio
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